Advice series #2 - Comparing yourself to othersWednesday, October 22, 2014
I will hold my hands up now and say I compare myself to others regularly. Whether it be when I'm scanning the rails at Zara and I see someone dressed cooler than me, a girl at the gym with a better figure than me or someone in class with a better idea than me; it is something that I do on a daily basis and is also something I am taking control over and putting a stop to, because it's unhealthy.
So I'm not just writing this advice piece for you guys, but for me too.
1. Recognise yourself doing it. 9 times out of 10 I bet we don't even realise we are staring at the girl at the self service checkout in Tesco and wishing we had her amazing peachy bum and toned legs. So the 1st step is to try to catch yourself in this comparison mentality so you can put a stop to it. Seeing it as a bad habit will give you that mindset that you need to quit!
2. The models in the magazines don't even look like they do in the magazines. Photoshop is a wonderful but also dangerous tool, I have definitely learnt that while starting University. One of our 1st C.A.D lessons was to airbrush Coleen Rooney's bikini picture and it was shocking the things you could do, in the end she looked like a totally different woman. We live in a society where on a day to day basis we see pictures of fabulous celebrities and models and are told that this is how we should look. Recognising this as absolute b.s (I swear Candice Swanepoel is not a real person...who looks as insane as that in real life?!) will help you to stop comparing yourself to something that is, well, not real.
3. No 2 people are the same. Ignoring the whole twins thing, none of us look the same and we don't behave or act the same. We all have different personalities, likes and dislikes and experiences and this is something that we should embrace...how boring would life be if everyone thought the same things and looked the same way? There isn't another David Beckham and I think thats a great thing, it makes him even more special you know (I am day dreaming of him in his undies right now). Meaning we're all special because we are one of a kind... get where I'm coming from?
4. The people we compare ourselves to are insecure just like us. My best friend has an amazing figure, blonde hair and blue eyes and many people are envious of the way she looks. But she has insecurities, disliking her nose and constantly wishing she was 5lbs lighter. No one is perfect, we all have flaws and I'm sure even Beyonce has bad days (well maybe not, she flawless and all). What I'm trying to say is while you're sat their hating your arms someone could be looking at you and longing for your luscious long brown hair.
5. Stop focusing on the wrong person. Staring at pictures of Kendall Jenner on Tumblr isn't going to make you look any better, if anything it's going to make you feel worse. If you seriously want to change something like getting fitter than look at yourself and decided the things you'd like to improve. Spend time on focusing on yourself and who you want to be, not who someone else already is.
6. Comparison is the thief of joy. Referring to the quote at the start of this post, comparing yourself to others just ends up making you feel awful about yourself. When I'm doing a uni project I have a tendency to go through my classmates Instagram and see their ideas compared to mine and I end up not believing in myself and my capabilities and I lose inspiration and determination to do well - in turn making me feel down etc.
I know writing these points is easier than putting them into practise, but I feel we should all make a contious effort to try and stop comparing ourselves to others and having a little faith about who we are and what we can achieve.
Wake up every morning and say I'm the best bitch on the block while looking in the mirror, it'll do the trick (insert sunglasses emoji here)